Felt Up

PSA: Manul Cats

Sun, 26 Jun 2011 00:00:00 PDT

Recently I stumbled across an image of an amazing looking cat that was so fantastically fuzzy that it seemed to have some sort of photoshoppery involved.

But there was not. It was real. They are real. They're called manuls or Pallas's cats. I was surprised that these barrel shaped cutie pies haven't set the internet on fire with memes based on them. Well they have, just.. not in English. Russia has us beat on kitty memes it seems, a google search of "Погладь кота, сука!" results in many manuls.

Погладь кота, сука! Indeed.

Hyup ._.

Sun, 12 Jun 2011 00:00:00 PDT

I'm sad to announce that this is my last evening as a 20something.

Tomorrow I turn 30.

There is no doubt that this will turn me into a completely different human being. Soon the liver spots and crows feet will start forming. The clothing and music of those younger than myself will offend me and I will need to complain about them.

I hope that it will some how also usher in the dawn of a new era of productivity in my life. The desire to catch all the Pokemans, level up my duders, and generally slack off will fade. The magical Job Fairy will come and wave her wand above my head and grant me a salary paying gig.

*** UPDATE: One of my very dearest interweb friends has stepped in, so much of the following can be ignored, thanks to Saadat! ...well I mean besides the part that says I'm actually going to update, I'm going to stick to that. I SWEARS IT. ***

Sadly another thing that will very likely fade away is Pimp Cow.. for I have become such a loser that I cannot afford the $12 to renew the domain this year. I suppose I can re-host it on another domain, but eh.. the death of the domain may be the nail in the coffin. It's weird thinking about how when I started it 11 years ago, all I had was a computer with 120MHz processor, and drew the comic with the cheapest of ballpoint pens.

I only hope that whatever spam bot snatches it up will do the domain more justice than I did. If you'd like to donate to the renewal, there's a paypal button on the feltup site somewhere, I'm sure.. Gotta take the opportunity to be childish and beg before my odometer rolls over! If the domain manages to get renewed, then I super duper pinky swear that not only will I do at least once a month update of it, but I will do at least a once a month update of Felt Up, too.

Maybe I should do the latter, anyway.. I'll try. ._.

This update sucks though, so it doesn't count.

Hats for cats!

Fri, 03 Dec 2010 00:00:00 PST

Everyone knows that cats love to have hats put on their heads, and so I present this:

And if you've got your own clever saying or image you'd like to put on Fluffy, here's a blank hat!
It's also suitable for other small animals who don't mind a bit of torture. Just glue the top flaps together, haphazardly, so that the blue dot ends up on top.
It'll work.....

...probably....

...until your cat shreds it with hate.

Admire this kitty's ability to not freak out from hat wearing!

Skirtastic

Thu, 02 Dec 2010 00:00:00 PST

Oh Christmas Tree
Oh Christmas Tree
You stupid thing
You fell on me

Hopefully this should help yesterday's craft project a little!

The shape of the trunk makes me giggle.

Wed, 01 Dec 2010 00:00:00 PST

Hey, what's this?

It's my first ever attempt at a paper craft pattern.
You may ask, where's the star? Don't worry about that for now.

Note: If you don't have super nimble fingers, you may want to cut the tabs out a little larger than shown.

This is true.

Sun, 28 Nov 2010 00:00:00 PST

Paranoid of being stinky, but not willing to fork out moolah for the tiny quantity of destenching materials packaged with way too much plastic surrounding them, which needs to be replaced all too frequently for my tastes, I've taken to rubbing a rock on my armpits to stop the stank from brewing.

"It's the pet rock for people who are afraid they smell bad!" - quote stolen from IRC chat.
*winks at elissa*

Luckily it works. Potassium alum, amazing stuff, it kills the dreaded BEE OHHHHH microbes. I hear my anti-stink crystal should last years. My shirts are also happy they no longer have deodorant sludge caked in their crevices.

Also, I currently have a roof over my head, rejoice!

No joke! :D

Thu, 18 Nov 2010 00:00:00 PST

What were you for Halloween?
I was homeless.

sadly not a costume!

Yay for poodles!

Thu, 23 Sep 2010 00:00:00 PDT

My parents ended up adopting a second poodle after a play date with him showed how much better he (Roger) was at entertaining Daisy than we were.
It's surprising how much negative feedback one can receive about poodles. Sometimes it seems like folks would be more pleased to find out that I was hanging with some Pit Bulls or some other stereotypical tough dog.

These are not the tiny dogs that people picture when you say 'poodle' though. They're huge! Luckily unlike the smug folks on the interweb, when they're taken out and pranced around there's hardly anyone who doesn't crack a grin from seeing them, or want to touch their fluffy hair.

Amazingly I've never had a Poodle poop while on a walk. I think it's a breed trait.

Haiku to Last Night (with censor felt technology!)

Tue, 06 Jul 2010 00:00:00 PDT

Hot night, no blanket
Then upon me they descend
A hatched spider's nest

Shabobo!

Thu, 06 May 2010 00:00:00 PDT

Remember this? Well it turns out that my mom has had a similar doggy desire, and I get to somewhat live out my poodle dreams vicariously through her. I say 'somewhat' because she didn't want a miniature poodle, but a standard sized one. Standard Poodles, my gosh, they are big!

She's apricot coloured, and her name is Daisy. Her tricks include: sit, speak, lay down, roll over, fetch ball, barking insanely at any sized bird that she sees and running away if you call her, especially if she finds away outside their fenced yard.. which she cleverly does often.

DO A BARREL ROLL!!

Tue, 04 May 2010 00:00:00 PDT

It's easy to do barrel rolls if you're shaped like one :3

Corrections: Glasses

Sun, 02 May 2010 00:00:00 PDT

Recently when my mom ordered my brother and dad some new glasses, she got me a pair as well for helping her out. I wanted something I could fall asleep in and not worry about crushing, but nothing that would make me look "emo". So I went with a lovely pair of $8 clear blue plastic frame glasses.
With my overbite and scoliosis, these glasses really do complete the look I was going for.

Corrections: Hair

Thu, 29 Apr 2010 00:00:00 PDT

My hair is long again! It's crazy how that happens.

Thankfully it hasn't reached ass length quite yet. I think I may have to intervene before it ever gets that long again.

Corrections: lagomorph

Tue, 27 Apr 2010 00:00:00 PDT

I only have one bunny now, Mr. Boot.

Kiwi and Mookie both died last month from separate bunny age related illnesses.

*sigh*

Corrections: Paul

Sun, 25 Apr 2010 00:00:00 PDT

It turns out that Paul the cat isn't actually Paul. He's a she. I decided to rename her to Dorris, because it didn't feel right to just take Paul and add some femininity to it, like Paula or Pauline or something. That's just too expected.
Let's just say that Dorris has a really huge package, for a she cat, and that's what lead to the confusion. Thankfully the vet cleared up the matter.

If only you didn't have to stare into a cat's backside so much to determine their gender, like cartoony eyelashes and blue eye shadow.